nintechno
aka Nathaniel Huntzinger is a 27.52 year old boy, has been a member since October 11, 2006, has scored 6,071 submissions, giving an average score of 2.24, helping 196 designs get printed.
Browsers are refreshing.
of 35 votes, 40% like it
I'm the nicest person you will ever read.
of 44 votes, 27% like it
Incomplete thoughts are
of 38 votes, 24% like it
The road more traveled is a highway.
of 36 votes, 22% like it
Math tastes like pi.
of 40 votes, 30% like it
According to my imagination, I'm a dinosaur.
of 47 votes, 36% like it
Sloths are barely getting by.
of 52 votes, 38% like it
Beards are like blankets for your face.
of 51 votes, 47% like it
Don't take life too seriously. Life just wants attention.
of 52 votes, 35% like it
I fight sleep with insomnia.
of 50 votes, 34% like it
Mushrooms think I'm a fungi.
of 43 votes, 16% like it
Astronauts look down on the world.
of 76 votes, 33% like it
Rome wasn't built in a day, but Lego Rome was built in two.
of 52 votes, 38% like it
I tell short stories. The End.
of 63 votes, 41% like it
I protect food with my stomach.
of 42 votes, 29% like it
On a scale of 1 to 10, how much do you weigh?
of 18 votes, 22% like it
Trees root for me.
of 57 votes, 33% like it
I don't trash talk, I recycle talk.
of 65 votes, 35% like it
If your name is Bread, you're toast.
of 52 votes, 38% like it
It's hard to be original, especially if you're a clone.
of 55 votes, 38% like it
Beethoven is a dog and a composer.
of 40 votes, 25% like it
I found my calling in a phone booth.
of 58 votes, 31% like it
In the future, I'll be old.
of 60 votes, 42% like it
Today in History: Something in the past happened.
of 56 votes, 34% like it
Bare Feet: They're not just for bears anymore.
of 41 votes, 24% like it
The weather is taking the world by storm.
of 48 votes, 27% like it
Today in History: You read my shirt.
of 59 votes, 27% like it
Sleeping is the easiest way to time travel.
of 49 votes, 53% like it
I'm so hungary I could eat turkey.
of 68 votes, 25% like it
Small dogs are like barking cats.
of 42 votes, 29% like it
Google is searching for me.
of 71 votes, 38% like it
Counting. It's as easy as 1, 3, 7.
of 60 votes, 33% like it
When I get in bed, I go undercover.
of 50 votes, 28% like it
You know what's striking? Lightning.
of 42 votes, 21% like it
You know what shocks me? Electricity.
of 59 votes, 36% like it
Music is for treblemakers.
of 70 votes, 31% like it
My camera won the Oscar for Best Picture.
of 52 votes, 21% like it
Doug is Funnie.
of 64 votes, 6% like it
Fires are addicted to smoking.
of 58 votes, 9% like it
In the time of chimpanzees, I was a Beck song.
of 68 votes, 13% like it
Oceans wave at me.
of 52 votes, 40% like it
I like pi. It tastes like 3.14.
of 54 votes, 17% like it
When I listen to music, I get hungry like the wolf.
of 65 votes, 17% like it
For some reason, the FBI wants me.
of 46 votes, 20% like it
I read too much into things. Like books.
of 62 votes, 26% like it
On the Road, I met Jack Kerouac.
of 40 votes, 18% like it
I'm a balloon, but I'm not up for it.
of 42 votes, 17% like it
I like ranch, but I'm not a rancher.
of 23 votes, 17% like it
Clones are not original.
of 28 votes, 25% like it
Know your roots, especially if you're a tree.
of 65 votes, 34% like it
Archaeology left me in ruins.
of 72 votes, 39% like it
A piano found my keys.
of 23 votes, 30% like it
I exercise by running out of ideas.
of 68 votes, 40% like it
Dear Gravity, I think I'm falling for you.
of 80 votes, 44% like it
Time travel really brings me back.
of 58 votes, 40% like it
Hot dogs bark.
of 56 votes, 9% like it
The wind blows my mind.
of 67 votes, 18% like it
At least the FBI wants me.
of 37 votes, 27% like it
Ears are good listeners.
of 52 votes, 29% like it
I wear asteroid belts.
of 39 votes, 26% like it
Synapses get on my nerves.
of 37 votes, 51% like it
My genes don't fit.
of 34 votes, 53% like it
I eat ice cream on Sundae.
of 27 votes, 41% like it
Email knows where it's @
of 28 votes, 57% like it
Sushi got the raw end of the deal.
of 49 votes, 55% like it
If you're drawing a blank, use a pencil.
of 37 votes, 51% like it
Bowling pins are on strike.
of 35 votes, 40% like it
Dracula likes to count.
of 40 votes, 43% like it
Pi tastes like 3.14
of 43 votes, 44% like it
Trees have no where to go but up.
of 51 votes, 45% like it
Martians often feel alienated.
of 43 votes, 37% like it
Geology knows how to rock.
of 45 votes, 51% like it
If the end draws near, draw something else.
of 40 votes, 53% like it
Board Games: The Number One Cause of Monopolies.
of 39 votes, 41% like it
And on the 7th day, God folded laundry.
of 49 votes, 41% like it
The metric system goes the extra kilometer.
of 36 votes, 44% like it
Don't waste time, recycle it.
of 36 votes, 64% like it
I replaced college with Wikipedia.
of 33 votes, 48% like it
Hamlet's do this.
of 32 votes, 22% like it
Big Brother is watching you read 1984.
of 42 votes, 43% like it
Fractions see the glass as 1/2 full.
of 47 votes, 43% like it
You can always count on numbers.
of 37 votes, 57% like it
I have one degree in Fahrenheit and the other in Celsius.
of 36 votes, 56% like it
The rulers I know are a foot tall.
of 31 votes, 48% like it
Sheep count humans at night.
of 37 votes, 46% like it
A tree stumped me.
of 39 votes, 49% like it
Antarctica: Where Cool Stuff Happens.
of 41 votes, 66% like it
I wish classical music would make a comebach.
of 47 votes, 55% like it
I have never made a misteak.
of 42 votes, 52% like it
Geometry helps me stay in shape.
of 42 votes, 43% like it
Oversleeping keeps the dream alive.
of 39 votes, 59% like it
If you think you can, you're aluminum.
of 41 votes, 56% like it
Frankly my dear, I like movie quotes.
of 43 votes, 58% like it
Dictionaries fill my life with meaning.
of 49 votes, 55% like it
A fortune cookie predicted we would meet here.
of 49 votes, 51% like it
Chess pieces sleep at knight.
of 49 votes, 43% like it
If the walls talked, I would be fluent in wall.
of 42 votes, 40% like it
Nature was born to be wild.
of 49 votes, 39% like it
I'm a fan, but not an oscillating one.
of 43 votes, 47% like it
Fingers make a point.
of 42 votes, 40% like it
I avoid diseases like the plague.
of 47 votes, 64% like it
Whales listen to Moby.
of 42 votes, 33% like it
I have been reincarnated as a slogan.
of 41 votes, 29% like it
True or False: This is a test question.
of 39 votes, 44% like it
Pangaea was split up for being a monopoly.
of 47 votes, 38% like it
Alfred Hitchcock gave me vertigo.
of 35 votes, 34% like it
Libraries do it by the book.
of 39 votes, 49% like it
I invest in Bonds, James Bonds.
of 39 votes, 49% like it
I get heroic in phone booths.
of 46 votes, 48% like it
My invisibility cloak is not working.
of 43 votes, 53% like it
Antonyms are celebrating opposite day.
of 36 votes, 44% like it
My train of thought is running on schedule.
of 43 votes, 42% like it
My alphabet soup tells me things.
of 48 votes, 58% like it
Music is nothing but treble.
of 46 votes, 50% like it
Dr. Frankenstein is a bodybuilder.
of 47 votes, 57% like it
Time travelers are ahead of their time.
of 46 votes, 57% like it
"No comet," said the flying space rock.
of 40 votes, 50% like it
Mathematicians know their limits.
of 41 votes, 54% like it
Artists win, lose, or draw.
of 35 votes, 51% like it
Evolution still hasn't given me mutant powers.
of 37 votes, 51% like it
In a plerfect world, I would spell things correctly.
of 38 votes, 50% like it
Sinatra is too frank.
of 41 votes, 41% like it
I'm in the middle of an inspirational montage sequence.
of 38 votes, 42% like it
With great brainpower, comes great eccentricity.
of 55 votes, 51% like it
Puzzles all want a piece of me.
of 47 votes, 51% like it
I've been moonlighting as a werewolf.
of 48 votes, 44% like it
I opened Pandora's Box and recycled it.
of 52 votes, 40% like it
Insomnia helps me stay up at night.
of 48 votes, 54% like it
"Cheerio," said my cereal.
of 42 votes, 45% like it
Negative people need a proton injection.
of 48 votes, 56% like it
Zombies speak a dead language.
of 44 votes, 57% like it
When hell freezes over, I'm making snow angels.
of 55 votes, 51% like it
I fight flies with chopsticks.
of 55 votes, 42% like it
If you like answering questions, raise your hand.
of 52 votes, 46% like it
I cloned myself to hug more people.
of 46 votes, 43% like it
After years of searching, Waldo found himself.
of 55 votes, 60% like it
Organic: Another word for expensive.
of 45 votes, 53% like it
It's hard to stay positive when there's so many electrons.
of 50 votes, 66% like it
If you're feeling blue, you might be a Smurf.
of 56 votes, 61% like it
Simon says listen to Garfunkel.
of 58 votes, 41% like it
Change is good, but I don't like pennies.
of 63 votes, 51% like it
Balloons are living it up.
of 72 votes, 46% like it
Pediatricians treat everyone like children.
of 53 votes, 64% like it
Scales are always getting in the weigh.
of 51 votes, 59% like it
Imagination is a good way to make things up.
of 53 votes, 58% like it
Frosting is usually the icing on the cake.
of 54 votes, 69% like it
"I don't believe in quotation marks."
of 51 votes, 41% like it
If you're feeling down, blame gravity.
of 47 votes, 49% like it
"Stop using telepathy," you thought.
of 44 votes, 57% like it
Play board games at your own Risk.
of 57 votes, 42% like it
I chronicled my trip to Narnia.
of 45 votes, 42% like it
Being immortal is getting really old.
of 61 votes, 56% like it
Elevators take me to the next level.
of 57 votes, 65% like it
If we draw straws, I'm using a pencil.
of 54 votes, 63% like it
Twitter keeps following me.
of 65 votes, 60% like it
Take it easy, but bring it back.
of 53 votes, 45% like it
Oceans wave at you.
of 55 votes, 56% like it
I was framed by a picture.
of 49 votes, 53% like it
When you need a date, grab a calendar.
of 53 votes, 53% like it
Falling asleep at the keyboard is like alsdkjfaldkjfd.
of 66 votes, 65% like it
Hugging trees is a contact sport.
of 35 votes, 34% like it
Grammar mistakes is stupid.
of 45 votes, 51% like it
If I join a movement, it will be symphonic.
of 43 votes, 47% like it
My gut reaction told me to eat it.
of 52 votes, 65% like it
Sleeping is how I time travel.
of 58 votes, 50% like it
Lincoln shoots and four scores!
of 57 votes, 47% like it
Lava lamps are domesticated volcanoes.
of 56 votes, 66% like it
I don't trust hurricanes. They have shifty eyes.
of 56 votes, 57% like it
Small dogs are like cats that bark.
of 32 votes, 53% like it
I bet you five dollars that I have a gambling addiction.
of 51 votes, 59% like it
Reading: What you're doing now.
of 51 votes, 53% like it
Bored? Do something dull and repetitive.
of 43 votes, 56% like it
I'm so hungry hungry I could eat a hippo.
of 53 votes, 62% like it
Triangle solos have three parts.
of 46 votes, 48% like it
The Mayans will release a new calendar in 2013.
of 59 votes, 56% like it
Nudists have trouble stripping.
of 55 votes, 53% like it
Interview vampires at your own risk.
of 48 votes, 48% like it
I watch the weather channel to relax.
of 34 votes, 44% like it
The galaxy is for hitchhikers.
of 47 votes, 38% like it
Cameras keep me focused.
of 59 votes, 66% like it
Zombies don't call shotgun.
of 46 votes, 59% like it
Swing sets allow people to fly short distances.
of 63 votes, 62% like it
Gogh Gogh gadget paintbrush.
of 67 votes, 64% like it
In the Future, mosquitoes will still suck.
of 78 votes, 65% like it
All of my peeps are marshmallows.
of 76 votes, 70% like it
Save the world with a memory card.
of 63 votes, 49% like it
Don't spread rumors, spread butter.
of 51 votes, 45% like it
Redundancy is dumb and stupid.
of 71 votes, 65% like it
You only live twice if you're James Bond.
of 50 votes, 48% like it
Fight the power, turn off your electricity.
of 78 votes, 63% like it
Keyboards help me Esc.
of 85 votes, 72% like it
I eat fortune cookies...in bed.
of 38 votes, 45% like it
My emperor is a penguin.
of 64 votes, 50% like it
Invisible people think I'm paranoid.
of 80 votes, 63% like it
Charles left me in charge.
of 62 votes, 50% like it
The late bird gets the other worm.
of 61 votes, 46% like it
Calculus derives me crazy.
of 79 votes, 62% like it
H.G. is not feeling Wells.
of 62 votes, 47% like it
I stole your thunder and sold it on ebay.
of 64 votes, 52% like it
My train of thought has passengers.
of 37 votes, 43% like it
Phobias are afraid of me.
of 75 votes, 64% like it
My political view has nice scenery.
of 70 votes, 50% like it
I lost my cape fighting crime [on back of shirt]
of 69 votes, 61% like it
My thoughts are cloudy with a chance of brainstorms.
of 71 votes, 61% like it
Curiosity killed my cat and I want revenge.
of 92 votes, 68% like it
My password is ******
of 79 votes, 48% like it
Math has serious problems.
of 72 votes, 69% like it
Cool things happen in Antarctica.
of 66 votes, 59% like it
I keep my vital organs in a rib cage.
of 46 votes, 43% like it
Model citizens carry glue guns.
of 76 votes, 51% like it
Immortality increased my lifespan.
of 62 votes, 53% like it
"Bonsai," said the tree.
of 57 votes, 44% like it
Bats can read my shirt [printed upside down]
of 70 votes, 50% like it
I don't fear change, I pocket it.
of 84 votes, 63% like it
There's something fishy about the ocean.
of 64 votes, 48% like it
My humor is too dark to see.
of 76 votes, 57% like it
I'm leaving dying to the last second.
of 66 votes, 56% like it
I'm allergic to food poisoning.
of 61 votes, 51% like it
Aliens need more space.
of 59 votes, 51% like it
Houston listens to all of my problems.
of 56 votes, 57% like it
Wisdom teeth fail at giving advice.
of 63 votes, 54% like it
I tell my problems to Houston.
of 70 votes, 61% like it
Joy can jump for herself.
of 71 votes, 58% like it
Due to shortages, life will no longer be handing out lemons.
of 66 votes, 65% like it
Opportunity knocked down my front door.
of 59 votes, 47% like it
I'll stop eating bacon when pigs fly.
of 67 votes, 54% like it
Instead of keeping the peace, give it away for free.
of 63 votes, 65% like it
The smart chicken flies a helicopter across the road.
of 54 votes, 52% like it
Fairy tales paint Grimm pictures.
of 61 votes, 54% like it
Tree branches are getting twiggy with it.
of 53 votes, 51% like it
I forgot my stroll down memory lane.
of 53 votes, 58% like it
I oppose the rule of thumb.
of 62 votes, 71% like it
Screenwriters are plotting against me.
of 56 votes, 55% like it
Tomorrow is like today, but in the future.
of 66 votes, 62% like it
Take a stand, but leave the lemonade for me.
of 57 votes, 60% like it
I plead the 5th symphony.
of 55 votes, 49% like it
I hunt playwrights with deadly shakespeares.
of 53 votes, 45% like it
The road less traveled is under construction.
of 71 votes, 58% like it
Jack and Jill should have used the faucet.
of 66 votes, 55% like it
I think magnets are particularly attractive.
of 59 votes, 64% like it
Click pens help cure sadness.
of 47 votes, 55% like it
Critics agree: everything sucks.
of 61 votes, 66% like it
Today's weather is perfect for world domination.
of 57 votes, 65% like it
Shhhhh...my foot's asleep.
of 52 votes, 54% like it
Broccoli: Trees for Little People.
of 58 votes, 60% like it
Geometry is fun for all shapes and sizes.
of 51 votes, 63% like it
Bingo does not like his name-o.
of 45 votes, 51% like it
Gravity really dropped the ball.
of 57 votes, 60% like it
I found Waldo with Ctrl+F.
of 68 votes, 63% like it
Math trees have square roots.
of 73 votes, 60% like it
Beavers are damming the nation.
of 51 votes, 65% like it
Pianos don't lose their keys.
of 80 votes, 66% like it
Iceland: Where Dreams are Bjorn.
of 70 votes, 59% like it
Disco fever wiped out a generation.
of 71 votes, 66% like it
I bought a vowel and returned it.
of 58 votes, 47% like it
I gave Heimlich the maneuver.
of 45 votes, 36% like it
I sent my computer to boot camp.
of 67 votes, 61% like it
I was fired today. From a cannon.
of 70 votes, 56% like it
Lunch is not allowed at the The Breakfast Club.
of 76 votes, 57% like it
It's not you, it's me. And the rest of mankind.
of 77 votes, 71% like it
Showers turn into soap operas.
of 61 votes, 46% like it
Air pollution takes my breath away.
of 78 votes, 65% like it
Genies encourage wishful thinking.
of 66 votes, 65% like it
All of my guilty pleasures were found innocent.
of 72 votes, 67% like it
Do you like my hair? I made it myself.
of 66 votes, 47% like it
I won't reveal my true identity until the season finale.
of 64 votes, 56% like it
Let math solve your problems.
of 71 votes, 63% like it
Shirts dye and fade away.
of 60 votes, 60% like it
Videogames teach the importance of saving lives.
of 72 votes, 72% like it
The future knows too much.
of 63 votes, 57% like it
My boxfort has cannons.
of 64 votes, 36% like it
If you can't win, lose.
of 62 votes, 55% like it
I subtracted and made a difference.
of 76 votes, 67% like it
The teacher's pet has fleas.
of 56 votes, 54% like it
I play Monopoly in Candy Land.
of 57 votes, 49% like it
Optimus numbers are prime.
of 66 votes, 55% like it
Misery loves company and bingo.
of 60 votes, 55% like it
Sherlock is my holme boy.
of 83 votes, 69% like it
Economics cost me a free lunch.
of 66 votes, 52% like it
Believe it or not, I am Ripley.
of 77 votes, 44% like it
History is right behind you.
of 81 votes, 53% like it
I dropped physics because of gravity.
of 89 votes, 56% like it
Red Rover is tired of your invitations.
of 111 votes, 62% like it
On casual Fridays,
I wear space suits.
of 50 votes, 36% like it
My pet raven quotes everything.
of 86 votes, 42% like it
Not all ranchers are jolly.
of 75 votes, 43% like it
Frozen pizzas are deadly frisbees in disguise.
of 89 votes, 47% like it
My cat has a Ph.D. in string theory.
of 90 votes, 57% like it
Photos can be so negative.
of 98 votes, 54% like it
Tetris taught me the fundamentals of architecture.
of 146 votes, 65% like it
Let's throw a revolutionary tea party.
of 134 votes, 52% like it
Hitchhikers gave me two thumbs up.
of 166 votes, 58% like it
In an alternate dimension, I just saved your life.
of 152 votes, 52% like it
My sleep cycle needs training wheels.
of 154 votes, 49% like it
I will defeat you in a choreographed fight scene.
of 198 votes, 60% like it
I feel more heroic in phone booths.
of 180 votes, 48% like it
I tend to fight fire with water.
of 151 votes, 62% like it
Chute, I forgot my ladder.
of 221 votes, 64% like it
Nothing ever develops at a writer's block party.
of 189 votes, 48% like it
Real bear hugs are often fatal.
of 250 votes, 66% like it
Bubble wrap is an inexpensive form of therapy.
of 202 votes, 55% like it
Origami experts fold under pressure.
of 245 votes, 61% like it
Getting lost is really just accidental sightseeing.
of 225 votes, 58% like it
Dear diary, I wrote today's entry on a shirt.
of 231 votes, 49% like it
Death sentences are grammatically incorrect.
of 232 votes, 50% like it
I fight crime with onomatopoeias. POW!
of 351 votes, 59% like it
Mathematicians find strength in numbers.
of 183 votes, 42% like it
Today is my favorite day of the week.
of 168 votes, 39% like it
Verbs are too tense.
of 229 votes, 45% like it
My darkest hours are always at night.
of 345 votes, 51% like it
Question marks suspect everything.
of 220 votes, 46% like it
Zombies mostly slow dance.
of 286 votes, 45% like it
My air guitar is very difficult to tune.
of 219 votes, 47% like it
Made of 100% recycled genetic material.
of 203 votes, 43% like it
I will rewrite history to make this moment less awkward.
of 285 votes, 46% like it
Apostrophes are so possessive.
of 238 votes, 45% like it
80% agree: 4 out of 5 works too.
of 294 votes, 45% like it
Galaxies are solar powered.
of 194 votes, 43% like it
Astronauts take meteor showers.
of 175 votes, 44% like it
Geologists know how to rock!
of 169 votes, 45% like it
I'm a body of water.
of 303 votes, 39% like it
Stop blaming video games. They babysit your children for free.
of 371 votes, 47% like it
Pencils aspire to be No. 2.
of 491 votes, 57% like it
You may only correct me with a red pen.
of 438 votes, 45% like it
Save your strength, there's a boss battle ahead.
of 373 votes, 43% like it
Evens are against all odds.
of 390 votes, 42% like it
Speed limits make time travel impossible.
of 488 votes, 45% like it
Slogans that have been deleted or that have been dropped from the contest
2001 was a time of odysseys.
of 4 votes, 25% like it
A cactus is high in the desert.
of 1 votes, 100% like it
A landslide brought Fleetwood Mac down today.
of 3 votes, 33% like it
A long time ago, water took over the world.
of 35 votes, 17% like it
A tree asked me a question. I was stumped.
of 55 votes, 31% like it
After watching The Muppets, I no longer need antidepressants.
of 52 votes, 23% like it
Aging. It takes a long time.
of 54 votes, 20% like it
Ancient creatures exercise and get dinosaur.
of 14 votes, 14% like it
Artists retrace their steps.
of 45 votes, 22% like it
Astrology died of Cancer.
of 12 votes, 25% like it
Astronauts look down on people.
of 47 votes, 26% like it
At 7-Eleven, they really like July 11.
of 54 votes, 17% like it
Babies win, lose, or crawl.
of 6 votes, 17% like it
Bands are into cymbalism.
of 37 votes, 27% like it
Bare Feet: Not Just for Bears.
of 52 votes, 13% like it
Bare Feet: They're Not Just for Bears.
of 5 votes, 20% like it
Billy Corgan is smashing pumpkins.
of 57 votes, 14% like it
Birds are high.
of 40 votes, 28% like it
Blankets cover me from pillow fire.
of 31 votes, 13% like it
Blankets have it covered.
of 41 votes, 39% like it
Books are going undercover.
of 5 votes, 20% like it
Bowling alleys are not outside.
of 48 votes, 10% like it
Breaking the ice is easier with a hammer.
of 4 votes, 25% like it
Bring the pain and an anti-inflammatory to heal me.
of 25 votes, 4% like it
Bruce Springsteen was born in the USA.
of 40 votes, 3% like it
Calculators know the difference.
of 56 votes, 39% like it
Canadians are born with DNA.
of 46 votes, 15% like it
Captchas: Something you can't read.
of 6 votes, 33% like it
Cats think they're purfect.
of 4 votes, 25% like it
Change makes cents to me.
of 21 votes, 14% like it
Change talks cents into people.
of 29 votes, 17% like it
Change the world . . . or the channel.
of 57 votes, 33% like it
Class warfare happens in elementary school.
of 7 votes, 14% like it
Claw machines are down with stuffed animals.
of 4 votes, 25% like it
Cloning helped me find myself.
of 70 votes, 44% like it
Clouds are all of the above.
of 15 votes, 13% like it
Computers hand out programs.
of 41 votes, 7% like it
Dear Diary, I don't know where you are.
of 2 votes, 50% like it
Do artists retrace their steps?
of 49 votes, 14% like it
Do black holes think they suck?
of 66 votes, 41% like it
Don't get even, be odd.
of 2 votes, 50% like it
Don't punch a hurricane in the eye.
of 7 votes, 14% like it
Don't tell anyone I'm a secret agent.
of 17 votes, 29% like it
Dream catchers play baseball.
of 5 votes, 20% like it
Drummers are cymbolic.
of 1 votes, 100% like it
Dumbphones are Smartphones without all the appxiety.
of 2 votes, 50% like it
Economics is too supply and demanding.
of 4 votes, 25% like it
Electricity has all the power.
of 5 votes, 20% like it
Food is good when it's food.
of 30 votes, 13% like it
Four Square and Seven Playgrounds ago...I like recess.
of 6 votes, 33% like it
Frankenstein is a bodybuilder.
of 39 votes, 26% like it
Grammar gave me a life sentence.
of 23 votes, 22% like it
Gravity: That's How I Roll.
of 38 votes, 39% like it
Hermits don't like the buddy system.
of 15 votes, 27% like it
Houses have windows. They have blue screens, too.
of 4 votes, 25% like it
I fall asleep at my keyboarfjkdlllldlkjfffffffff.
of 43 votes, 28% like it
I am allergic to food poisoning.
of 5 votes, 20% like it
I am Fe Man.
of 28 votes, 11% like it
I am the sun's father.
of 53 votes, 9% like it
I ask my wisdom teeth for advice.
of 45 votes, 33% like it
I bark at dogs.
of 53 votes, 28% like it
I bought a game show. It cost a wheel of fortune.
of 5 votes, 20% like it
I bought a vowel and returned it for a Wheel of Fortune.
of 27 votes, 7% like it
I broke a record just to see if it would repeat itself.
of 2 votes, 50% like it
I built a mood swing out of wood and crazy.
of 31 votes, 23% like it
I burned down a fire with water.
of 5 votes, 20% like it
I climb family trees.
of 39 votes, 33% like it
I comb toupets for a living
of 6 votes, 33% like it
I conditioned Pavlov and his dog.
of 7 votes, 29% like it
I couldn't sleep, so I became an insomniac.
of 1 votes, 0% like it
I cut my nails and then hammer them.
of 41 votes, 15% like it
I dated a calendar for one year.
of 4 votes, 25% like it
I don't have a nickname. That's my nickname.
of 36 votes, 6% like it
I don't like button that.
of 3 votes, 33% like it
I don't like hair, but it's growing on me.
of 14 votes, 7% like it
I don't like listening to hospital records.
of 3 votes, 33% like it
I don't like to run, except when I'm being chased.
of 46 votes, 26% like it
I don't shower, but the weather does.
of 35 votes, 9% like it
I don't sleep, I close my eyes.
of 2 votes, 50% like it
I don't take tests, I steal them.
of 14 votes, 29% like it
I don't talk to myself, I talk to my clone.
of 44 votes, 27% like it
I drink orange juice with extra pulp fiction.
of 35 votes, 20% like it
I eat bay gulls.
of 13 votes, 15% like it
I exclaim my punctuation points.
of 1 votes, 100% like it
I found Waldo and his family.
of 39 votes, 23% like it
I give astronauts their space.
of 49 votes, 39% like it
I got my wake-up call from my phone.
of 22 votes, 14% like it
I have a mosquito and a computer byte.
of 2 votes, 0% like it
I have a problem. I close my eyes when I sleep.
of 35 votes, 9% like it
I have been moonlighting as a werewolf.
of 24 votes, 38% like it
I know a hermit. He's like a crab.
of 7 votes, 14% like it
I know a lot. I park my car there.
of 75 votes, 64% like it
I know a ruler that is a foot tall.
of 8 votes, 38% like it
I know a ruler. It's in my desk drawer.
of 5 votes, 20% like it
I like cameras. They see the big picture.
of 24 votes, 33% like it
I lost a bet and now I can't find it.
of 66 votes, 18% like it
I lost my place reading your mind.
of 36 votes, 19% like it
I lost my wallet and found another one.
of 67 votes, 19% like it
I love weather.
of 42 votes, 12% like it
I messed with Texas and got panhandled.
of 1 votes, 100% like it
I named my cheese steak after Philadelphia.
of 1 votes, 0% like it
I paint using martial arts.
of 3 votes, 33% like it
I played The Game of Life and died.
of 44 votes, 23% like it
I practice Tai Chi in slow motion.
of 22 votes, 27% like it
I read the neverending story while counting to infinity.
of 4 votes, 25% like it
I signed up for three courses: breakfast, lunch, and dinner.
of 22 votes, 18% like it
I sleep on a bed.
of 1 votes, 100% like it
I stereo off into space rock.
of 4 votes, 25% like it
I take my herbs on thyme.
of 8 votes, 38% like it
I take showers in the rain.
of 62 votes, 21% like it
I tell blankets to cover me.
of 20 votes, 15% like it
I use Google to find my keys.
of 54 votes, 13% like it
I was the inspiration for myself.
of 26 votes, 19% like it
I wash soap with water.
of 27 votes, 30% like it
I watched The Good, the Bad, and the Spaghetti Western Reference.
of 6 votes, 33% like it
I went a round the world in 79.99 days.
of 6 votes, 33% like it
I went to the dentist and got drilled.
of 7 votes, 14% like it
I'm a stormtrooper. I like to go outside when it rains.
of 50 votes, 22% like it
I'm going on a trip, but not an acid one.
of 19 votes, 5% like it
I'm going to count to infinity or die trying.
of 3 votes, 33% like it
I'm going to punch Facebook in the Zuckerberg.
of 8 votes, 13% like it
I'm going to trail off now...
of 3 votes, 33% like it
I'm greater than less than.
of 52 votes, 25% like it
I'm not a stick figure, but I can draw one.
of 3 votes, 33% like it
I'm not good at memorizing lin
of 27 votes, 4% like it
I'm not good at taking tests unless I'm stealing them.
of 4 votes, 25% like it
I'm not tired. I'm sleepwalking.
of 42 votes, 24% like it
I'm the cat whiskerer.
of 39 votes, 21% like it
If Billy Joel didn't start the fire, who did?
of 9 votes, 11% like it
If I speed date, will I get pulled over?
of 42 votes, 29% like it
If I were a tree, I could branch off.
of 48 votes, 15% like it
If I were a tree, I would bark at people.
of 71 votes, 25% like it
If I were a tree, I would be over there.
of 55 votes, 15% like it
If love is a battlefield, how am I still alive?
of 22 votes, 18% like it
If the future repeats itself, I'm going back to the future.
of 25 votes, 28% like it
If you can't fall asleep, jump asleep.
of 16 votes, 13% like it
If you go off the deep end, make sure you can swim.
of 4 votes, 25% like it
If you need a hand, buy a deck of cards.
of 9 votes, 33% like it
If you stare long enough, a hidden picture will appear.
of 61 votes, 31% like it
If you're trapped in a horror movie, try not to die.
of 50 votes, 16% like it
Immortal cats have infinite lives.
of 16 votes, 25% like it
In one state, I drive on Rhodes.
of 3 votes, 33% like it
Insomniacs have trouble chasing their dreams.
of 1 votes, 0% like it
Is Debbie really little?
of 42 votes, 14% like it
Isaac Newton taught me the ways of the force.
of 41 votes, 24% like it
Isaac Newton taught me the ways of the force.
of 1 votes, 0% like it
Keyboards are out of Ctrl.
of 46 votes, 26% like it
Keyboards cover my shifts.
of 5 votes, 20% like it
Kitchens dish it out.
of 10 votes, 20% like it
Laughing at funny people is mean.
of 37 votes, 14% like it
Libraries are my booking agents.
of 43 votes, 30% like it
Life is weird, especially if you're tired.
of 38 votes, 24% like it
Lightning strikes me as a shocking fellow.
of 14 votes, 14% like it
lol stands for leg of lamb.
of 57 votes, 14% like it
love thy neighbor, especially if they're sexy
of 5 votes, 20% like it
Loves conquers all . . . and so do armies.
of 3 votes, 33% like it
Magazines have serious issues.
of 74 votes, 24% like it
Mannequins are people too.
of 8 votes, 25% like it
Maps know where it's at.
of 4 votes, 25% like it
May the Force be with your movie quotes.
of 40 votes, 33% like it
Mimes give me the silent treatment.
of 51 votes, 41% like it
Mirrors are so vain.
of 11 votes, 9% like it
Mirrors give me the time to reflect.
of 39 votes, 36% like it
Mosquitoes will always suck.
of 63 votes, 22% like it
Mosquitoes are only good at sucking.
of 17 votes, 6% like it
Mountains peak at an early age.
of 34 votes, 38% like it
Movies are a reel good time.
of 11 votes, 18% like it
Music doesn't give me any treble.
of 42 votes, 21% like it
Music gets me in treble.
of 19 votes, 32% like it
My sink drains me.
of 9 votes, 22% like it
My bed and I are sleeping together.
of 69 votes, 46% like it
My blood is under pressure today.
of 41 votes, 17% like it
My board game is sorry.
of 1 votes, 100% like it
My body smells like awesome.
of 42 votes, 24% like it
My body smells like me.
of 41 votes, 7% like it
My computer is in a processing group.
of 41 votes, 7% like it
My dog is a teacher's pet.
of 33 votes, 12% like it
My favorite knot to tie is an astronaut.
of 45 votes, 20% like it
My favorite president hasn't been born yet.
of 57 votes, 25% like it
My goal in life is to count to infinity or die trying.
of 35 votes, 23% like it
My goal in life is to count to infinity or die trying.
of 49 votes, 31% like it
My house has windows. I'm glad it doesn't shutdown.
of 2 votes, 0% like it
My house has windows. It has blue screens, too.
of 32 votes, 19% like it
My juice box packs a punch.
of 3 votes, 33% like it
My stereo has a radiohead.
of 42 votes, 19% like it
My thumbs gave me two thumbs up.
of 15 votes, 27% like it
NASA needs more space.
of 3 votes, 33% like it
Nobody is perfect. Unless your name is Nobody.
of 19 votes, 16% like it
NPR helps me relax.
of 10 votes, 20% like it
On Twitter, I follow the Yellow Brick Road.
of 32 votes, 22% like it
Oranges can't rhyme, but they can concentrate.
of 47 votes, 49% like it
Pens are in my click.
of 11 votes, 27% like it
People are driving.
of 19 votes, 5% like it
People change. So do vending machines.
of 3 votes, 33% like it
Phones call me out.
of 9 votes, 22% like it
Physics taught me about the letter F.
of 48 votes, 25% like it
Planks of wood get board.
of 10 votes, 30% like it
Pools are so shallow.
of 49 votes, 14% like it
Popeye eats spinach with olive oil.
of 45 votes, 24% like it
Put yourself in someone else's shoes even if they don't fit.
of 50 votes, 26% like it
Puzzles promote world piece.
of 53 votes, 25% like it
Quite please, my orange is trying to concentrate.
of 57 votes, 25% like it
Racist people never learned how to color.
of 36 votes, 25% like it
Reading helps build character development.
of 48 votes, 23% like it
Save the world. My name is World.
of 5 votes, 20% like it
Scientists are into experimenting.
of 5 votes, 40% like it
Sleep hygiene is falling asleep in the shower.
of 52 votes, 13% like it
Sloths can barely get by.
of 16 votes, 13% like it
Smartphones have appxiety.
of 23 votes, 9% like it
Soccer is my goal in life.
of 4 votes, 25% like it
Spread Joy, Love, and Butter.
of 48 votes, 33% like it
Stick figures draw from trees.
of 19 votes, 21% like it
Subtract and make a difference.
of 53 votes, 34% like it
Sunfish don't live in space.
of 3 votes, 33% like it
Superman found his calling in phone booth.
of 0 votes, 0% like it
The butterflies in my stomach are making me nervous.
of 5 votes, 20% like it
The FBI thinks I'm sexy. That's why they want me.
of 48 votes, 15% like it
The number two always wants seconds.
of 3 votes, 33% like it
The only French I know are horns.
of 3 votes, 33% like it
The ruler of my country is a foot tall.
of 49 votes, 6% like it
There are no miracles in miracle whip.
of 56 votes, 23% like it
There's always a brain stuck in my head.
of 26 votes, 12% like it
Tigers are friendly until they attack you.
of 42 votes, 19% like it
Time doesn't fly so I named my bird Time.
of 43 votes, 19% like it
Time travel helps me pass the time.
of 27 votes, 19% like it
Tomorrow will be like today but different.
of 20 votes, 25% like it
Treasure chests have nipples.
of 39 votes, 18% like it
Vacuum cleaners clean vacuums.
of 33 votes, 6% like it
Video games take me to the next level.
of 55 votes, 22% like it
Water and I shower together.
of 29 votes, 21% like it
What do genies wish for?
of 55 votes, 24% like it
What do genies wish for?
of 31 votes, 52% like it
When bananas get in trouble, they always split.
of 4 votes, 25% like it
When hell freezes over, I'm going ice skating.
of 6 votes, 33% like it
When I grow up, I want still be alive.
of 0 votes, 0% like it
When I need a hand, I buy a deck of cards.
of 23 votes, 26% like it
When I read books, they feel my Grapes of Wrath.
of 7 votes, 29% like it
When I sweat, I smell like awesome.
of 48 votes, 19% like it
When I sweat, I smell like shampoo.
of 47 votes, 4% like it
When it rains, the ground is showering.
of 22 votes, 9% like it
When the time is right, I'll buy a clock.
of 3 votes, 33% like it
Whoa, I'm Keanu Reeves.
of 72 votes, 10% like it
You only live once unless you're reincarnated as something else.
of 30 votes, 13% like it
You're going to be okay.
of 45 votes, 20% like it
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